little. yellow. different. A weblog by Ernie Hsiung

dance dance humiliation

So, I’m back from E3, the annual video game expo in Los Angeles.  The conference was a total blast, but mostly because this was my first trip to E3 and you lose yourself with the sights and the sounds and the Namco dancers(tm) and the weapons demonstrations. 

A highlight of the trip:  Karaoke Revolution Party.  OK, maybe not so much the game itself, but the story surrounding it.

Konami Rep:  Would you like to try out Karaoke Revolution Party?  It combines the joy of Karaoke with a Dance Dance Revolution mat.
My friend, Ken:  Holy crap, you have to sing AND dance?  They should make you act and just call it “Triple Threat.”
Ernie:  “FAME!  I’m gonna live forever.”

Konami Rep:  Hey you, you look like the perfect person to try a song.
Ernie:  Crap.

(After deciding to pass on Beyonce’s “Crazy in Love,”  I start to do a rendition of “Take On Me” while doing syncopated dance steps on the DDR Pad.  There is no way on Gods Green Earth that a white person would be able to last 45 seconds on anything tougher than Beginner mode.)

Voice of Cable TV Host behind me:  YO!  What can you tell us bout this game right here?
Konami Rep:  Karaoke Revolution Party is… well, why don’t you see for yourself?  THAT PUDGY ASIAN GUY IS PLAYING RIGHT NOW!

(Cue Ernie suddenly being surrounded by a cameraman, a guy holding a boom mic and someone who could only be described as, well, Lil’ Jon.)

TV Host:  AWWW SHIZ!  [ed note:  he says "shiz," of course, because we're being taped.]  I THINK WE LOOKIN AT THE NEXT AMERICAN IDOL RIGHT HEE-YUH!
Ernie:  good shit.
TV Host:  YEE-UH, GOOD SHIT! (gives look to cameraman who gives me a dirty look for using profanity on-camera)
Ernie:  My bad.

Yah-ah!

I so would never touch that game. I can’t dance, I can’t sing. (Suddenly I’m channeling Phil Collins)

So where can we see the video of you?

That Konami guy had a good pitch. Ordinarily, I wouldn’t even karaoke drunk at 3AM, but suddenly there I was singing Material Girl in a skirt and heels on my way to an 11:15 meeting. Wish I had known you were going to E3. I would have stopped by and said hello.

(starts chanting)
Go Ernie, get busy, go Ernie, get busy

Don’t tell my husband about this, he might get it.

We both love DDR and monopolized Karaoke Revolution when it first came out at the Sony Playstation store.

Go Ernie, get busy, go Ernie, get busy.

Rerun from the Yahoo! 360° blog? I’d like a refund, please.

Eric in Seattle
Professional Heckler

Isn’t that game just perfect for you, Ernie?

white people invented riverdancing, so suck it.

You are hilarious! Definitely most entertaining blog I’ve read!

Karaoke and a dance mat? Please, nobody tell my housemate…….

You know, it probably WAS Lil’ John. MTV is showing clips of him there with a microphone.

the fact that you know what a triple threat is? You offi cially rock, ernie.