ernie’s weekend (part 2 of 3)
(The setting: The next morning, in bed. Ernie is woken up by a call on his cellphone.)
Ernie: Gaaah… <morning voice>hello?</morning voice>
Voice on other end: Do you shave your butt?
Ernie: Huh? What…? Who are you?
Voice: I’m not talking about the hairs on your cheeks, either. I’m talking about, well, you know. Inside.
Ernie: This is Lil, isn’t it? You woke me up after going to a rave to ask me if I shave my asshole?
Lil: So, do you?
Ernie: Uhm, no. Dare I even ask why?
Lil: My straight friend decided to shave down there because it bothers him when he #2’s. Now he feels violated.
Ernie: Oh. My. God.
Lil: So do any of your friends?
Ernie: What, do you think we sit around the coffeehouses, casually asking each other if we shave… that? Uhmm, tell your friend he has nothing to worry about, except for the awkward stubble that will be growing in a couple of days.
Lil: Thanks, babe. I knew I could count on you. *click*
(Nope. Absolutely nothing furthermore to say. Nosiree.)
