little. yellow. different. A weblog by Ernie Hsiung

i will watch the gay pillow fights no more

After having HDTV for a couple of weeks now, I’ve been noticing my viewing habits have changed a little. This is partially due to the fact that I had to stop using my TiVo for a DVR that could support HDTV, and the controls kind of, well, suck. (Disclaimer: I previously worked as a contractor there for about a year.)

More importantly though, I’ve been noticing that I’ll find myself fascinated at shows, for the sole reason that they’re prettier to watch than other television shows, nevermind I only have two channels that show hi-def content 24 hours a day.

Announcer: “The Inca people began as a tribe in the Cuzco area around the 12th century CE. Under the leadership of Manco Capac, they blah blah blah blah blah…”
Ernie: (thinking) “Oooh. Manco Capac has a mole on his nose! Teehee!”

Announcer: “The nesting flamingoes gather into groups and gather to fresh water to drink and bathe…”
Ernie: (thinking) “Oooh. The nesting flamingoes have moles on their noses! Teehee!”

Seriously, with the exception of Late Night with Conan O’Brien, my regular television viewing habits have completely changed to watching the following: the incubations of oysters, old rich white people practicing their golf swing so they don’t hook right, X-treme freestyle skiing, a horrible, horrible cooking show where they make desserts out of Spenda. And yet, I can’t be swayed.

Announcer: “Next on Ernie’s theoretical perfect television show: hot guys in boxers talking about web standards and gay pillow fighting afterwards!”
Ernie: Ugh. It’s not high-def. Whatever. (Turns off television, writes this blog entry)

(”Gay pillow fighting?” Uhm, that’s just lame.)

Now Gay Extreme Pillow Fighting might be kind of cool. And that shouldn’t be confused with Extreme Gay Pillow Fighting either. Totally different thing.

What about gay cowboys eating pudding?

I think a game of “Who’s your Daddy?” woould be fun too. Contestants guess the daddies of some boys.

How come gay pillow fighting is “just lame”, but lesbian pillow fights are widely accepted as “hot”?

Oh yeah, for the same reason I don’t get along with most straight guys…that’s right…nevermind…

They so have to make that show. Seriously. I’m writing to G4 and LOGO right now.

Isn’t pillow fighting gay by default?

Pillow biting, Ken. Get your derogatory slang right!

Poor Ernie. *hug*

“where are your hands?”

“between two pillows”

“those AREN’T PILLOWS!!!”

Yeah, but how can you tell which pillows are gay?

Forget gay pillows… what will happen to the sad, neglected, lonely, gay TiVo!?

SLICE right, HOOK left.

My dad (a golf pro) made sure I knew the freaking difference.

I am annoyed by people who make superfluous corrections in the comments.

I hate myself right now.

HDTV is addictive. I too have been watching a lot of tribal stuff, just ‘cuz.

Oh I forgot to introduce myself… Ponzarelli via JozJozJoz. Hiya - Nice to meet you, like your blog.

What if the pillow fighting involved mud?

I mentioned this post to my partner and he said “I wonder if our cable company ever got around to offering an HD box with DVR?” We checked, they did, and 3 days later the ReplayTV is relegated to the bedroom TV while the big screen set now has HD with a Moxi DVR. We thank you, and Adelphia thanks you (though the extra $9.95 a month won’t quite get them out of bankruptcy).

Ever heard of Veronica Mars on UPN? I know what you’re thinking, UPN… surprisingly its an awesome show and i’m pimping it like crazy because i’m obsessed. Anyway, check it out, youll love it, and will probably get addicted to it like I did.

Oh yeah, I have to warn you, if you have any heart conditions or lung problems, be weary and take your meds before watching the last two episodes of the first season. They will break your heart.

Then watch the premiere of the second season on the 28th! After America’s Next Top Model.