Joe Millionaire
I’ve only seen the first episode and the last 15 minutes of the final episode of Joe Millionaire, but I’ll give you the low-down of the episode and the “surprise twist,” in case you missed it:
Zora, the girl that Evan picked: So, you just told me that you’re a construction working who gets paid $20,000 a year instead of a multi-millionaire.
Evan: GAAARRRRGH! (drags his knuckles on the ground)
Zora: Uhmm… that’s cool, I guess. (eyes the TV camera nervously) Yeah. Yeah, it’s cool.
Evan: ME FOUND TRUE LOVE! GARRRGH!
This is the part where Paul, the delightful British stereotype butler of Evan, walks up to the couple with a covered silver platter. “Please let there be a rabbit under there,” says my roommate.
Paul: For choosing true love over money, I shall make you both millionaires. I present you a check for one million dollars. (opens his talking umbrella and flies away†)
Evan: GARRRRGH! ME LIKE MONEY!
Zora: (weeping into the camera) I am living my fairy tale. I really, really am.
Me personally, I’m waiting for Married By America.
† To my shock and horror, I learned via the comments that Paul the butler is Australian, not British. Therefore, please replace the phrase “opens his talking umbrella and flies away” with “finds a giant crocodile in the swamp and wrestles it to the ground.” Thank you.
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