mothers, hide your gay children’s cabbage patch dolls

(The scene: A gay Halloween party. Richard is dressed as a zombie in a night robe holding a Cabbage Patch doll.)

Adam: What? No teddy bear?
Richard: This is Joey. Joey’s my childhood buddy – he’s my bestest friend in the whole wide world! (Hands Joey to Adam)
Adam: Hmmm… is this a genuine Cabbage Patch doll? (Adam pulls down the dolls pants to check for the Xavier Roberts signature on its ass, then at the spur of the moment, buries his face in it)
Richard: NOOOOOOO….!! (Runs off, screaming)
Adam: (To Richard) WHY ARE YOU RUNNING AWAY?
Ernie: I don’t know. Maybe it’s because you’re RIMMING HIS CABBAGE PATCH DOLL.
Adam: Oh. I’m drunk, aren’t I?
Ernie: Little bit.