Not Quite the Mission Hipster
After two weeks here in the Mission, I think I’m giving illusions that I’m slightly more settled in San Francisco now. Some furniture needs to be sold and I need to somehow buy a drawer to fit all my clothes, but if you walked into my charming, Full House-like Victorian unit, you would say, “my, Ernie’s place looks quaint and charming” and be done with it.
But I still kinda feel like a stranger in a strange land when it comes to life in the Mission, an area of San Francisco that’s filled with hipsters and gang-bangers and crackheads and Vice Presidents of Product Development, all within close quarters, doing their best to ignore each other. Like, I somehow need to shred all my preppy tight clothes that I’m too fat and self-conscious to fit into, as well as lose my awkward baggy clothes and fraternity t-shirts I’ve had since my college days. In 2000. From what I’ve seen from people walking around the area, I kinda need a rock pullover and a lip ring, lose the oversized cargoes for a pair of those weird fucked up acid-washed jeans and a haircut like the lead singer from OK Go.
Basically, I have to look like an overweight heroin addict from the 1970’s to fit in this neighborhood. How the fuck am I going to pull that off? When someone I see around this neighborhood wears a Fidel Castro hat, they look like a hipster. When I wear one, I look like a communist.
I don’t fit in the neighborhood yet. But then again, it’s only been two weeks. And I’d still rather live here than in Fremont.

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