little. yellow. different. A weblog by Ernie Hsiung

Posted
20 May 2003 @ 10am

Tagged
Uncategorized

the common-man’s guide to The Matrix: Reloaded

(Don’t worry. This post will be spoiler free, for the most part. I can’t make any gaurantees about what people post in the comments, however. Actually, if you want true spoilers, read the comments on Kottke’s post, where it’s practically a fucking Oprah Book club on that shit.)

Yesterday, Mike and I went to see The Matrix: Reloaded. For those that haven’t seen it yet, this is short synopsis of the movie:

Everyone in movie: …blah blah blah we take ourselves too seriously blah blah blah blah…

(Some completely unneccesary rave scene occurs, which I have some sympathy for because it was filmed in the San Francisco Bay Area. Keanu fights 500 versions of the same guy with a pole in a leather trenchcoat. Something blows up.)

Audience: whoo!

Keanu: …blah blah blah blah blah…
Old guy: …blah blah blah EXISTENTIALISM blah blah blah CONTROL, ERGO blah blah…
Audience: (…what the fuck are they talking about?)

(Something blows up. Credits roll.)

Audience: whoo!

And that’s all you need to know, really. I’m sure you could start a debate after the movie on reality, control and the role of humans and machines in society. When it all comes down to it though, the movie is just people in fabulous outfits beating each other up.


45 Comments

Posted by
Ariel
20 May 2003 @ 10am

Ergo, I still want to see it!


Posted by
Naladahc
20 May 2003 @ 10am

I can’t remember the last time I was as bored sitting through a film.

Oh. Wait. Attack of the Clones.

I just could not find any reason to “get into” Reloaded. It just was one of those films that seemed like it would never end.


Posted by
mister justin
20 May 2003 @ 11am

Being a fan of the first film, I went in to it with moderate expectations. In the end I had to say that X2 packed more punch though.

And, Ernie, nice synopsis!


Posted by
Donny O
20 May 2003 @ 11am

Ernie you never caese to crack me up!


Posted by
Aristan
20 May 2003 @ 11am

I hear the special effects could even make Keanu look like he was acting…


Posted by
Jon
20 May 2003 @ 11am

The single most commented-upon item in the sequel has been that Trinity executes an actual hack with an actual computer. Woohoo!


Posted by
tonies!
20 May 2003 @ 2pm

must..not..spoil..movie..
Does anyone else who programs think Neo is the embodyment of “error handling”?
GAH.. ok..that shouldn’t give away too much..
*runs away*


Posted by
mikebiggz
20 May 2003 @ 3pm

It was good, not great, but for anyone who does see it, there is a trailer of Matrix 3 after the credits roll at the end.
By the way, they are the longest credits in the world and the shitty music doesn’t help it go by any faster.

The credits had everything from personal drivers to Mr. Fishburne’s personal nose hair clippers, to Mr. Reeves personal fluffer. well no, but it’d be funny if it did.

The trailer for Freddy Vs. Jason was…killer >)
It’ll suck ass but I’ll still see it, just for the comic value.


Posted by
Kallisti
20 May 2003 @ 3pm

Firstly, I’d like to thank Mike and Ernie for agreeing with me on my overall opinion of the movie so that I don’t have to wonder if they’re morons or not (they’re not)..

second of all, the Matrix3 teaser at the end of the credits is NOT worth the wait.

Third, and lastly, ugghhh, I want that two hours of my life back! :)


Posted by
gnome-girl
20 May 2003 @ 3pm

funny thing though I kind of like fab dressed people beating each other up :P


Posted by
JII
20 May 2003 @ 4pm

The first 30 minutes took me out of the movie, and I never got back in. I kept thinking, “You can fly INTO people and destroy them from the inside with little effort, and yet you….” And what the hell did that rave have to do with anything? Maybe the machines SHOULD win….


Posted by
heather
20 May 2003 @ 5pm

My favorite part was the highway chase. Laurence Fishburn has the most GODAWFUL monotone voice too. Other than that I thought it was okay. I like the RATM song too, ahh sweet sweet memories.


Posted by
Todd B.
20 May 2003 @ 7pm

The funny thing is that the Matrix in the movie is set in the late 90’s. As is, apparently the movie in which “hot bands” like Rage Against the Machine and Dave Matthews Band, are the height of popularity.
Where the movie was weak was when it seemed the filmmakers forgot the fact, that basically, it’s a cool kung fu movie. Stop trying to be all epic fillmmaking and shit and give us some cool action sequences. I’m not even bother talking about how much that whole ‘rave’ sequence sucked.
-T.


Posted by
Cyber_smile
20 May 2003 @ 7pm

Gee… Let me guess — YOU ALL LIKE AMERICAN PIE, am I right? The movie is excellent, but not for people who have little brains.


Posted by
Decay
20 May 2003 @ 8pm

For those that the last speech from the movie visit…
[self link]
http://rantspace.org/blog/archives/000799.shtml
[/self link]


Posted by
bonnie
20 May 2003 @ 11pm

the purpose of the “rave scene” is to show what everyone is fighting for. humanity. the same purpose as bilbo’s birthday party at the beginning of lord of the rings.

it’s not too hard to figure out why there would be rage against the machine songs in the matrix.


Posted by
walter
21 May 2003 @ 12am

Decay,
Thanks for the transcript. Now I can go see the movie. A friend warned me about this scene. I guess it would be worse to hear it and not get to re-read it like I just did.

The content itself really isn’t that difficult to understand. It’s merely God, creation, man, sin, savior and freewill. Easy shmeasy! The whole Matrix concept is quite silly when you think of how they merely ripped off the story from the Bible to begin with. They named the characters with proper names of concepts; Trinity, the Oracle. Quite the story…but it’s been told before. It’s actually been the number one selling book for years, the Bible that is.

egh…whatever…I’ll still pay my $9 dues and go see it sometime


Posted by
octopus
21 May 2003 @ 12am

I had and have very mixed feelings about the movie. On the one hand, it is as the critics say *fatally* flawed, because the acting is piss-poor, the humans behave in incredibly stupid ways, and the fight scenes are pointless exercises in special effects with all the tension and suspense of an episode of “Designing Women.” On the other hand, there is a good chance that the filmmakers had a complex religious allegory in mind, and the film almost makes sense when viewed in this light. So far it really hasn’t done much to comment on or extend the metaphors, just regurgitate them in a different context, though it’s almost clever enough to be worthwhile in that. Also the cinematography is for the most part utterly lovely.

The third film may succeed in justifying the fact that the movie is an exercise for all involved in Looking Way Cool (the monotone conferences in leather and shades are hilarious) and that the human characters are robotic and unsympathetic (maybe they’re becoming too much like machines? or maybe they’re not human at all?). I’m crossing my fingers.


Posted by
octopus
21 May 2003 @ 12am

Oh…and if humanity equals giant half-naked raves that look like over-arty fashion advertisements, then MTV *is* the Matrix and our souls are all lost.


Posted by
Jeff
21 May 2003 @ 7am

OMG, ERNIE! I laughed `till I pee’d, then I laughed some more!

You rock!


Posted by
Ken
21 May 2003 @ 9am

I dont’ know why everyone thinks that The Matrix is some kind of re-telling of the Bible. True, they did appropriate certain elements, but just because there’s a savior character, doesn’t mean he’s necessarily Jesus. Those who feel that Neo is a Jesus character seem to be ignoring one essential fact. Jesus didn’t beat the living shit out of everyone with kung-fu.


Posted by
mister justin
21 May 2003 @ 9am

nah, Jesus had super head explodey powers–like killing teachers with a slap on the face.


Posted by
ernie
21 May 2003 @ 10am

“head explodey?”


Posted by
octopus
21 May 2003 @ 12pm

Here’s some thoughts on the possible religious and philosophical influences on the Matrix:
http://www.corporatemofo.com/stories/051803matrix.htm

So, he sort of is Jesus, and he sort of isn’t.


Posted by
Matt
21 May 2003 @ 2pm

You people need to get over it! For the last time, it is not a freakin’ bible allegory.


Posted by
court
21 May 2003 @ 3pm

So it does suck! Thank you for reaffirming my reasons for not seeing Matrix:Reloaded.


Posted by
monde
21 May 2003 @ 4pm

Being a dedicated non-Hollywood-moviegoer who nevertheless had a fairly religiously fanatic appreciation of Matrix The First…I made a point of seeing Matrix the Second without exposing myself to any reviews, preconceived notions, etc. so that my own opinion of it would be exactly that.

I was flummoxed, to say the least…and disgusted, to say the most.

Primary disgustipation factor: the Counsellor of Zion having a chat with Neo says “I see you’re not fat. Good. Means you’re still human.” WHAT THE FUCK? That was a totally fucking unnecessary slam on thick folks who - um - are NOT all Slaves of the McDonalds Reality. My immediate and loudly shouted response was “Then maybe the FAT ones are MORE than human?”

Secondary disgustipation factor: WHAT the FUCK was the deal with Merovingian and his stupid French accent and his “I adore French wines” and yadda yadda blah…”?!?!?! OBVIOUSLY someone decided we needed to slip in some France bashing into this “revolutionary”, “mind-freeing” film.

As for the rave scene: I was OK with that, would have preferred to see a few more longhaired males and females weighing more than 150 lbs present. Or don’t they allow them in Zion?

And while on that subject, what’s with all the biblical references, anyway? I think they dilute the point a LOT. But whatever.


Posted by
heather
21 May 2003 @ 5pm

don’t crap your pants man, not everyone is out to get large people. france bashing has been going on for years, even before the past military conflict. do you need a hug?


Posted by
the mighty jimbo
21 May 2003 @ 10pm

where does wolverine and darth maul fit into the movie? or am i confused?


Posted by
Eric
22 May 2003 @ 12am

Christ on a biscuit, its a fucking movie. Ya’ll need to calm down.


Posted by
guyweb.co.uk
22 May 2003 @ 1am

All you need to know…

Ernie supplies us with the common-man’s guide to The Matrix:Reloaded. Much the same as the first one then? Now for


Posted by
tonies!
22 May 2003 @ 5am

For Monde:
“The Merovingians were the ruling Frankish dynasty; they were succeeded by Charlemagne’s family, the Carolingians, and then by the Capetians, who thought they were descended from Christ.”
Also quoted from the same source:
“The guy in the health food store where I buy my granola and soy milk thinks that The Merovingian was one of Neo’s predecessors, but all the explanation I need, as well as the way I understand his obvious fascination with human pleasures, is found in Genesis 6:4?”There were giants in the earth in those days; and also after that, when the sons of God came in unto the daughters of men, and they bare children to them. . .” According to various sources, including Kabbalah, this mating of men and angels (here, a computer program from an earlier version of the Martrix) is what produced various monsters, such as the vampires and wraiths that serve the Merovingian. Dante, bringing a Christian sensibility to the proceedings, placed these monsters in his Inferno. Thus, though the Merovingian is sort of an antediluvian remnant of the former world, he’s also (as is shown by the fact that his wife is named Persephone) kind of like Hades, the holder of the keys to the underworld. What the Keymaker does, much like the golden bough the Sybil gives Aeneas, is open doors and permit Neo access to the underworld?or, in this case, the Core.”

So.. france bashing or not.. he Does serve a purpose..
Now back to you “hip people” being “witty”


Posted by
ernie
22 May 2003 @ 9am

“I see you’re not fat. Good. Means you’re still human.”

Whoa, there! I totally don’t remember that part of the movie. I remember the talk about still being movie, but it was referring to Neo not being able to sleep, not passing over the plate of Oreos*. Unless I completely missed that part.

* Mmmm, Oreos. Tasty, hydrogenated Oreos.


Posted by
t
22 May 2003 @ 9pm

kudos to eric…it is just a movie afterall…meant to entertain…no big thing…no movie is going to bring world peace…stop world
hunger…or put a chicken in every pot!…so get
over it folks…there are more important things
in this life than worrying about bible stuff
and the fatness thing…in connection to a movie
that is…oh!…and christ biscuit was almost as
good as the guy that came up with ass clown…i
still laugh at that one!


Posted by
nakko
23 May 2003 @ 8am

> “I see you’re not fat. Good.
> Means you’re still human.”
>
> Whoa, there! I totally don’t remember
> that part of the movie … it was
> referring to Neo not being able to sleep

Agreed. He was talking about sleep. Fat? Where the hell did you come up with that?


Posted by
Zentinal
24 May 2003 @ 4pm

Just a movie - sorry, that’s about as untrue as calling saying a house designed by Ghery (whether or not it is a successful house) is just a shelter. Films are an art form that only make sense by plugging into our basic mechanisms for understanding the world, that use dream logic to stitch together a narrative, that are one of the ultimate expressions of the marriage of craft, art and industry (who was it who called movie studios “Dream Factories”?). True, “The Matrix Reloaded” isn’t the finest example of filmaking, but that doesn’t stop the series from being important to the the cinema. I definitely enjoyed it.


Posted by
Paul
24 May 2003 @ 9pm

The film does suck, but it is still worth seeing.


Posted by
An Oasis
24 May 2003 @ 9pm

The Matrix Reloaded

The Matrix Reloaded is a movie strong on tenuous computer analogies continuing that theme, this film was the Pause/Break key, in the Matrix trilogy this was the intermission. I hadn’t really read anything about this before going so my expectations…


Posted by
Wali
25 May 2003 @ 2pm

Can someone translate what the Merovingian is saying when curses in french?


Posted by
Alex
26 May 2003 @ 10am

First, well put tonies!

Le Monde: He doesn’t say a word about being fat. Nor is this film anywhere near French bashing. You need to pay closer attention to what’s going on around you and stop being so self conscious.

The film is on the screen, not in your mind.

To the contrary of your observations:

- This film shows Fishborne’s bulbous gut in the middle of his silly monologue. (my least favorite part of the movie) But not because of Morpheus’s pot belly, just because the speech wasn’t so great.

- The movie cleary states that out of all languages, French was the _most appealing_. That qualifies as a compliment in my book.

- Finally, one critical fact that your observation is missing is that as the Archy talks about evil in (hu)man’s history images of Hitler and US President BUSH flash on the screen. I’d say that’s another homage to the French and their opinion set.

blahblahblahblah.

Loved the movie, although I’m not nearly as critical as most.


Posted by
tramadol
12 August 2004 @ 3am

Online Tramadol is one of the most prescribed treatments for pain in the world. More than 55 million people have taken cheap Tramadol to relieve their back pain, shoulder pain, and other chronic conditions. By acting on parts of the brain that trigger pain, and by reducing the size of pain signals that travel throughout the body, Tramadol provides powerful pain relief in just minutes! Buy Tramadol Now or visit this site: http://www.top-tramadol.com


Posted by
tramadol
12 August 2004 @ 3am

Sorry to keep you  Tramadol, but there Tramadol HCL is one of the most prescribed treatments for pain in the world. More than 55 million people have taken cheap Tramadol to relieve their back pain, shoulder pain, and other chronic conditions. By acting on parts of the brain that trigger pain, and by reducing the size of pain signals that travel throughout the body, Ultram Tramadol provides powerful pain relief in just minutes! Buy Tramadol Now or visit this site: http://www.x-tramadol.com


Posted by
soma
12 August 2004 @ 3am

Best deal everywhere Soma - Carisoprodol is a prescription medication that is used to relax your body, relax your muscles and help put stress and other difficulties behind you. Online Soma, to do Cheap Soma is now available online with a prescription. You can obtain a prescription online by answering a short questionnaire about your medical history Buy Soma or visit http://www.one-soma.com


Posted by
soma
12 August 2004 @ 3am

Go there guys Cheap Soma Carisoprodol is a prescription medication that is used to relax your body, relax your muscles soma and help put stress and other difficulties behind you. Online Soma is now available online with a prescription. You can obtain a prescription online by answering a short questionnaire about your medical history Buy Soma or visit http://www.top-soma.com


Posted by
soma
12 August 2004 @ 3am

Best deal cheap soma carisoprodol is a prescription medication that is used to relax your body, relax your buy soma muscles and help put stress and other difficulties behind you. online soma is now available soma online with the best online prescription. You can obtain a prescription online by answering a short questionnaire buy soma about your medical history soma or visit http://www.soma-cheap-soma.com