So, a co-worker tipped me off that I’ve been nominated for the 2006 Gay Bloggies, created by totally not-safe-for-work gay adult site Queerclick. The inspiration comes from the mainstream Bloggies awards, except for a couple of differences:
- All Blog award nominees must be gay men, and “Bloggers must be able to prove (!!) their ‘gay authenticity’ via their weblog” according to their rules and procedures page. Okay, so… do I scan in a gay certificate? Do I get one of those javascript flash applets that people put on their MySpace page that say “YOU ARE 100% TEH GAY?” If someone comes out as bisexual, do they put an asterisk next to your blog on the winners list?
- The Bloggie Awards, the last time I checked, did NOT have a “Best Porn Star” category.
- Also unlike Nikolai’s Bloggies, all the awards are subscriptions to gay porn sites.
So, yeah. I’m in the “Best Asian Blog” category. Taking a cursory glance at all the other blogs nominated, everyone seems to be either this uber-fabulous personality or have a photo of themselves with their shirt off. Some of them are masturbating. I briefly deduce that I am the fattest person on this entire page and contemplate not eating for three and a half weeks. As I’m currently eating a carnitas burrito at the moment, the thought quickly passes.
But somehow, I’m on this list. Because I’m funny.
None the less, I do appreciate the people who nominated me for the competition, for no other reason than to say “Hey, Ernie is Asian AND gay, let’s put him in the category.” As far wanting to win, I don’t necessarily need a subscription to CircleJerkBoys.com, but thanks for the offer. 
Update: My co-worker Brian, after reading this post, decided to make a “gay authenticity certificate.” Kind of horrifying, but he did spend a lot of time with Illustrator working on this.
I feel like something needs to be said but for the life of me I can’t come up with a damn thing. So, uhm, good luck??
> I don’t necessarily need a subscription to CircleJerkBoys.com
Would that be because you already have one?
…crying myself to sleep I didn’t get nominated for “Sexiest Queer Candy” (whatever that is).
go go ernie!!
Not just because you’re funny, and you know it.
We can always exchange that for a spot on QueerClick.com where we feature you in your birthday suit. YUM!
All the best!
Didn’t some 80s politician refer to “card-carrying homosexuals?” So there’s obviously a card, right? You just show them your gay card.
I wish you luck, though I don’t know if that means I hope you win, or I hope you don’t. The validation would be nice, and you can always donate your winnings to the, uh, needy.
Now if that new banner in your site doesn’t 100% authenticate you as a gay blogger, I’m not sure what will.
Rotating banners… I meant the REALLY GAY ONE with the purple bear, rainbows, mountains, and battle-wounds.
uber original shows up uber fab anyday!
Yours is a very interesting reaction on being nominated. It’s actually a refreshing change from the ‘oh I feel so honoured’ kinna reaction I have been reading all around. I know you don’t care about the award and that is the reason why I have voted for you.
And where is the banner photo came from? Somewhere in south India I guess.
YOU ARE FUNNY!!!
And you know the GayBloggies ceremony will be heckuvalot more sarcastic, witty and fashionable than the Webbys could ever be!!
On the update: He left out the “Can karaoke to Britney Spears, complete with original dance moves and ass shaking” *check*.
Yeah, Ernie…um, good luck?
imphaldiary: You’re right – two of my banner photos are from Mysore, when I was in Bangalore for a week for work.
Although looking at Wikipedia, it looks like I should now call the places I visited Mysuru and Bengalūru…
After all that, I just had to go and vote for you. It’s a shame it doesn’t seem like they’ll actually have an awards ceremony. Imagine what fun and craziness *that* would be.
P.S. You’re not only funny, but uber-fabulous overall too.
I love the erect pen best.
Also the plaid background on this site? That alone should qualify you, heh.
The certificate was hilarious. Even though it took me a second or two to figure out why there was a rooster at the bottom of the list.
I just wanted to tell you that I love reading your blog and I voted for you last week.
I did vote for you, Ernie, and your being nominated is how I found your website in the first place. I have been an avid reader ever since.
Interesting how nominations have other results., some of which are not immediately apparent. Kinda philosophical for so early on Black Friday.
Well I see the results are in for the gay bloggies, and littleyellowdifferent was sadly overlooked… but clicking through the list of winners I don’t think you need to be too upset. All the winners are, well, a tad boring. You should have easily won the “Humour” and “Writing” categories but you weren’t even nominated in them! What gives??
So, Ernie, my question to you: who do you think should have won in some of those categories? If the gay bloggies can’t tell us whose blogs are worth reading besides this one, maybe you can! Please, bestow upon us your links of wisdom.
Mmmmmm… carneeeeeetas!
And you lost to one of the weirdest blogs I’ve ever seen, a super-skinny guy who thinks he’s fat and walks around streets in Manila looking super queer. 加油!
[...] More than a year ago I was nominated for the the same awards, similar to the Weblog Awards that are announced every year at the SXSW conference except with categories like “Best porn star,” “Sexiest Queer candy” and sponsored by a bunch of gay porn all-male adult entertainment websites. I didn’t win the “Best Gay Asian” category, and after a year of therapy and mild sedatives to dull away the thought of being the “WORST GAY ASIAN EVER,” I’ve moved on with my life. [...]