Everyone here is on to me.
“On to me” meaning this: shortly after I posted the doughnut story, the interview story and the smoking story, one of the web developers passed on the web address to the rest of the team. I kinda expected that, so no big deal. What I didn’t expect was how fast word of mouth spreads.
Visual designer, who isn’t on the webdev team: Hey, your weblog is funny.
Ernie: Hey, glad you like. (pause) So which one of the web developers gave you the url?
Designer: … the web developers? Jane* told me.
Ernie: Who’s Jane?
Designer: She’s in the cubicle next to mine. Another visual designer.
Ernie: I don’t know a Jane. I don’t think so, anyway.
Designer: Oh. Well, I gotta go! Take care!
Ernie: (…do I know a Jane?)
So naturally, I am now competely paranoid and am hesitant to write anything work related on my weblog after alienating every excercising, oatmeal-eating non-smoker at Yahoo!. But even this has backfired:
Web Dev #1: Dude, you don’t write about us anymore. I’ve read that P. Diddy post twenty times.
Ernie: Nah, it’s just that I’ve been busy and…
Web Dev #2: What, are we not good enough for you to write about anymore?
Ernie: What? No! I just don’t wanna get in trouble, that’s all…
Web Dev #3: I’ve walked by Ernie’s cubicle three times doing zany things, hoping I would be blogged. Nothing.
Web Dev #1: Ugh, forget it. Hey everyone, you’re all invited to an oatmeal party in the cafeteria right now, except for Ernie!
Everyone in unison: OATMEAL!!!
Okay, the last two lines were a figment of my imagination. But you get my point.
* “Jane’s” name is changed to protect the innocent. Even though she reads my weblog and probably wouldn’t mind if I used her real name, and is probably offended that I am using an assumed name instead of a real one. Either way, I lose. Maybe I should just post pictures of cats.
Your like an online water cooler, people come to you for entertainment.
Very clever. Talking about them talking about you. This is sort of that passive/aggresive chinese thing we all learned from our parents…or is it innate?
“hey look at me!! I’m zany!!!”
thank you for the pictures of cats.
Coming up next week in Ernie’s “How to win over your co-workers guide”.. picking up the wrong end of the story, blogging it, and reaping the rewards.
(P.S. When is that little cartoon dude gonna re-appear?
Maybe you could get your co-workers to oatmeal wrestle — kind of like Jell-O wrestling, but messier and with a kind of granny aftersmell. Get your hot male co-workers to do it in Speedos. Definitely fun, man.
(Now, for the rest of the day, picture your hot male co-workers in Speedos. HA! I polluted your mind!)
What do you mean you don’t know me?! Expect further shunning from me and the Web Dev’s now! We will NEVER eat YOUR donuts!
What do you mean you don’t know me?! Expect further shunning from me and the Web Dev’s now! We will NEVER eat YOUR donuts!
I said it twice, because I meant it and it was worth repeating. Not because of some error or silly thing. I know what I’m doing.
I was beginning to wonder if you were going to write about your co-workers again too. that P.Diddy post got old about the 500th time I read it, and I don’t even work with you.
Actually, I’m kinda upset that the P.Diddy story isn’t at the top of the page. Now I’m gonna have to actually scroll down, and that always plays havoc with my coffee/doughnut/oatmeal mid-morning juggle.
>> I’ve walked by Ernie’s cubicle three times doing zany things
Ohmy, there has to be some funny stories about that. Please share.
badass cat page motherfucker!
Screw Yahoo!, we want election coverage!!
Speaking of zany things at the workplace, maybe you could set something similar up at Yahoo!
http://www.stealthdisco.com/
Hmm… who is the real “Jane”?? Moohoo hahaha, I’m secretly reading your blog one aisle away… rock on w/ the junior senior!
You should have known that the smartypants at Yahoo! would catch on quick.
Sadly I think that ones blogging techniques change after either the blog gets popular or you know that people you know are reading it (SO, parents, coworkers). Bitching about your boss when you know he reads your page is different than if you know he doesn’t.
I found your entry through a search query on Google! I fight for the rights of oatmeal lovers everywhere. Ernie, I assure you, you will love oatmeal by the end of this week. I’d also like to sponsor the wrestling event, but instead of hot male co-workers, I insist that you get the Dallas or Raider cheerleaders, or Vivid’s latest models for adult entertainment, for the wrestling extravaganza!
ernie…ernie…ERNIE!!!…do not worry your
little cutie pie head about your co-workers,
THEY do not matter…because…i’ve told you
before…and i’ll tell you again…………
YOU ARE GOD!…it’s as simple as that!
Off topic, but hilarious-Kikkoman!
http://yoga.at.infoseek.co.jp/flash/kikkomaso.swf
Post more pussy!
Post that they all smell of Guatamalan B.O.
where were you attempting to distribute these doughnuts?
http://shallowdeep.motime.com
Sup E dawg,
u’re just the whole 3 ring circus in one big hole… haha
I don’t know if you’re GOD, but you are awfully funny.
i’m surprised that the “web deveolopers” at yahoo didn’t already know about your site. and they call themselves web developers! pshaw.
That’s awkward to have everyone in your workplace, and possibly your boss readin’ your site. You’re probably making friends faster than Friendster ever could.
I saw Popeye’s Pho and Biscuits yesterday, and I thought of you
just cant win with fans, eh?
say, when are you gonna post about arnold?
jesus, ernie! get with it!
yahoo has visual designers ?
Popeyes sells pho and biscuits on the West Coast?!?
Like, like, vietnamese noodle soupyness and buttery biscuits?
::tries to think of how it would taste, dies::
I Still cant believe that they shunned your donut offering. What sorts of heathen are they? You are working at a high tech firm populated with cubicles. Donuts are practically a food group in that sort of place.
Maybe you should tell them that you will only blog about them more when they embrace their inner-geek and give up all the pseudo healthy nonsense.
Or you could go with the cats thing..
Fuck them for mocking you. Their punk asses should be happy to be able to use the words “Yahoo”, “employed” and “web dev” all in the same sentance.
They are mocking you, right?
Oh, uh, nevermind then.
Yeah, I get that “how come you don’t talk about me anymore” crap all the time now. I just don’t have the heart to say “well, I USED to like you so everything I wrote had a ‘friendly ribbing’ kind of quality to it. Now that you’re my actual boss/petty, mean, unreasonable and immature, the vibe might be closer to “FUCK YOU! Get the fuck away from me you FUCK!!” sigh. What would Emily Post do?
You’re so popular, Ernie! ^_^ How’d everyone at Yahoo find out about you, Mr. Famous?
Make an oatmeal donut. Then everyone will be happy.
the only thing good about yahoo is the free email. everything else sucks. plus lately, all yahoo wants to do is sell me things. my advice to jerry yang is to sell all his yahoo stock and get out while the getting is good.
can ya hear me jerry? hear me good.
HIEU
It was an inside joke. Because when he visited us in L.A. Ernie got dislexic or something when he saw Popeye’s Chicken and a tiny Vietnamnese restaurant connected to each other. And he was like “What? A Vietnamnese Popeye’s?”
you people scare me.
Yeah, forget Yahoo; I’d like to hear your view of the recall election.
I like the site and the idea! Great!
Best wishes and take care!
I like the name of your site. Especially “different”…sometimes it seems to me that different people are the only real ones.
Now see, this is why I refuse to work.
Oh.. ^^;
I was seriously like, “wow, things really are different on the west coast, crazy people over there, what with their austrian governor and everything..” ^^
Ernie, ‘Jane’ likes Luna bars. Loves ‘em. Trust me. And tell her I said hi!
I like your BLOG, and I am sorry that people are mean to you…I like you!
Haha Ernie is so famous now he has to change aforementioned names to “protect the innocent”.
damn i’d hate it if my coworkers found out about my site. except that i don’t have one. and that i don’t work at a major corporation. i don’t actually work for a corporation. i don’t think there are any corporations in berkeley….
