The Fast and the Filial: Oakland Drift
From the Vault. A story about dementia, remarriage, and trying to be a dutiful son without losing your mind.
Editor’s Note, 2025:
This was written in 2019, back when I was ping-ponging between coasts—wrangling aging parents, legal documents, and my failing grip on adulthood. My dad had dementia. My mom had Opinions. And somehow, against all logic and several decades of documented incompatibility, they got remarried.
It’s a story about filial duty, family absurdity, and how love sometimes shows up dressed like junk mail.
I'm resurfacing it because some parts still haunt me, like how my dad, for the entirety of our thirteen-year relationship, never once acknowledged him by name. And some parts still make me laugh out loud at the ceiling fan.
I.
Ring ring.
“Hi, Mom,” I answer.
“ER-NIEEEEEE,” she sing-songs in English before switching to Mandarin, lik…
